


Nightmares and Reality

by laurahonest



Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: F/M, Gajevy - Freeform, Nightmares, reliving past trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-12
Updated: 2014-05-12
Packaged: 2018-01-24 11:12:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1603073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurahonest/pseuds/laurahonest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gajeel has nightmares about things he did for Phantom Lord.  What will happen when Levy finds out she is the star of them?  Is reality worse than the nightmares?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nightmares and Reality

Sometimes Gajeel had nightmares. Usually they were of the day that Metalicana had disappeared. He was running through a forest searching and calling for his father. Tears were streaming down his cheeks and he kept falling and getting hurt because he couldn’t see through the stupid tears. Gajeel would wake up feeling scared, alone and miserable every time.

Gajeel wished those were the only nightmares he had as he sat on his bed alone gasping for air and trying to calm the terror he felt. The new nightmares he had were harder to bear. In the middle of the night Gajeel could almost wish that he had never joined Fairy Tail or made friends, especially with Levy McGarden. He didn’t really regret the new guild, the friends or even the feelings he had for his friends, but he really hated this new nightmare.

In his newest nightmare Gajeel was walking through the park in Magnolia whistling and cheerful. He noticed a large crowd and went to see what they were looking at. He edged his way to the front to check it out. Once he could clearly see he was met with the sight of Levy and her two Shadowgear teammates hanging from the tree. She was limp and bleeding, her bare stomach had the Phantom Lord symbol drawn on and she was bound by his iron. When he tried to escape what he had done to her the crowd became a solid wall, no matter how hard he pushed the people wouldn’t let him leave the center of their circle. He was desperate to get away because soon she would speak. The words she said tore at his soul. “Gajeel Redfox,” she began in a broken and soulless sounding voice, “You did this to me. You put me here. You destroyed my guild. And now you want me to forgive you. You want me to be your friend, your teammate? You dare to have feelings for me and hope that I could possibly love you? You are the worst thing that could have ever happened to me. I hope you choke and die alone.” Once she finished speaking Gajeel would wake up sweating, crying and begging the empty room for forgiveness. 

The nightmare became more frequent the closer he got to Levy. The speech varied, it got longer the closer he got to Levy too. He tried to distance himself from the petite mage but then she looked sad and he couldn’t bear to see her sad. He could sacrifice a little sleep if she didn’t look at him with those sad eyes. Gajeel had resigned himself to a life of interrupted sleep by the time Levy came to him and asked him to accompany her on a job. Jet and Droy were both sick and she needed the job to pay her rent but didn’t think she could do it alone. Gajeel had reluctantly agreed to help out.

He still wasn’t sure he should have agreed to go. What if he had a nightmare while they were on the job? What if he had _the_ nightmare while they were on the job? How on earth would he explain it to her? Would she even let him explain or would she leave him when she found out he had nightmares about her? This is exactly why he had wanted to bring Lily with him but Lily had gone with Carla and Happy to see the Exceed and make sure they were adjusting to life in this world all right.

Gajeel heaved a sigh and got up from his spot by the campfire. Sitting there all night fighting off sleep wouldn’t do him any good. He would just fall asleep the next day and let Levy down in the middle of the job. He crawled into his tent and settled in to sleep. He sent a silent prayer out to anyone listening that he wouldn’t have a nightmare or that it would at least be the childhood one if he had to have one.

\---------------------  
Levy woke up suddenly, her senses alert. She heard a lot of commotion coming from Gajeel’s tent and then he screamed her name. Levy bolted upright and struggled to free herself from her bedding to go help him. She had no idea what was happening or even if she could help him, he was so much stronger but she had heard the desperation in his voice when he called for her. 

She rushed past the fire towards his tent. It was closed but she could hear him struggling in there and he called her name again. She pulled the tent open and peered inside. He was alone but there was clearly something wrong. He was flailing around, there were tears on his cheeks and he was muttering “Levy, I am so sorry. I am so sorry Levy. I wish I hadn’t done that.” Levy let out a little gasp when she realized he was asleep and having a nightmare. It was horrible judging by the state of the big strong dragon slayer.

Levy hesitated a moment, nightmares and guilt weren’t really her best areas. Gajeel sobbed out her name again and she knew she couldn’t turn her back on him. She crawled into the tent beside him. She reached out and touched his face, gently wiping the tears off his cheeks. His thrashing slowed a little at her touch. Levy started speaking soothing words to him, “Gajeel, it’s ok. I’m right here. Shhhh, it’s ok Gajeel. I am here for you.” As she spoke she reached out with her other hand and started gently patting his head. She scooted towards him and pulled his head into her lap. Gajeel seemed to be calming down. She kept whispering soothing words and gently touching him. He was getting more still and seemed calmer. She was just about to slip back out of the tent when he let out a horrible scream, sat straight up and yelled “Levy no! Please don’t!” His eyes flew up and he saw her sitting there in his tent. Her face was startled but she didn’t have the same cold fury and hatred that she had exhibited in his dream.

Gajeel couldn’t help himself; he was still full of the terror and sorrow of his dream. When he saw the real Levy sitting in his tent without a speck of fear or hatred he collapsed with his head on her lap. He clutched at her and sobbed. He shuddered when she touched him but she just gently rubbed his back and whispered soothing things. 

Levy was shocked. She had never seen the big tough dragon slayer look so sad and vulnerable. She doubted anyone had ever seen him cry. She sat with him through his tears and waited until his terror abated. She gradually felt him relax as she gently rubbed his back. She had no idea what had happened, clearly his nightmare had been terrible. 

Finally Gajeel was able to let go of her and sit up. He was mortified that he had sobbed like a child on her lap but somehow he didn’t regret it. He wondered what she had heard him screaming. He had no idea how long she had been sitting in his tent trying to help him before he woke himself up. He owed her an explanation but he had no idea how to start one.

Levy quietly slipped out of the tent while Gajeel was staring at his feet and blushing. He felt even more embarrassed that she hadn’t let him explain but he didn’t blame her for not sticking around. He was surprised when she poked her head back in the tent. She crawled in and handed him a cup of water. Gajeel took the cup and drank it. He set it down and cleared his throat to explain. “Levy I,” was all he managed to get out before she stopped him. 

“Gajeel, it’s ok. I know you regret what you did when you were a member of Phantom Lord. I don’t have hard feelings. I wish we had met under better circumstances but I don’t blame you for following the orders of your Master. I forgave you a long time ago. I consider you a teammate and a good friend now. I just wish you would forgive yourself.”

How did this tiny girl always know what to say to him? Why did she have so much sway over him? He slowly reached out towards her but pulled his hand back before touching her. Levy reached out before he got his hand back and grabbed it. 

“Gajeel, please, let go of your guilt. You don’t need to hang on to it anymore.” There were tears in her eyes when she looked at him. She was crying for him? He took a deep breath and let go of the guilt, the pain, the sadness and reached for her. He pulled her into his lap and hugged her close to his chest.

“Thank you Levy,” he whispered as he gently kissed the top of her head. “Thank you for saving me again.” She was right. He had to let it go if he ever wanted to move forward in his life. He would let it go but he wouldn’t forget. He would remember that he had been a horrible person and that this tiny woman he could lift in one arm had forgiven the unforgivable and helped him to forgive himself. Levy McGarden, the solid script mage who held no grudges. She had accepted him and helped to heal his broken soul with her warmth and kindness.


End file.
